I did it.
I will be so relieved once I see my new doctors. I had to see my current one because I just couldn't wait for another sonogram.
Anyway. DH came home last night, asked me to sit, and he really want to talk to me one more time about finding out. Rolling my eyes, I let him have his say. He explained how it important it was and felt his anxiety was getting to him. He begins to cry. I felt really bad. DH never crys - this was the 3rd time I've ever seen him cry - the first time was after 3 months of dating, the second was after a really bad fight before we got married, and the third being last night.
I said 'Fine, you can know, but don't tell me'. It wasn't the answer he wanted to hear, but, he didn't protest.
We leave for the doctor. In the car, I got this overwhelming feeling of anxiety myself. For weeks I went back and forth, never really talked about it. I felt worse when I was sitting in the waiting room and it was a half and hour beyond my appointed time. It all came to me at once. Some of you know I was on anti-depressants before I got pregnant (weened off just in time)...since then I've been crazy emotional, but a part of me wanted to at least attempt a surprise because it was something I have never done in my life. Slightly bummed I feel I let myself down partially when the tech asked us if we're finding out and I immediately threw out the word 'Yes'.
At the very last minute, it all came to me, and I am very happy with my decision because...
WE'RE HAVING A BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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I am so over the moon it's ridiculous. I feel like this is not the end of a surprise, and I feel sort of relieved I can be a little more prepared for what I will be enduring. He is so perfect already. He was opening and closing his mouth, moving around, waving, and it suckingggg (really CS?) it's thumb at one point!
I will not however, be referring to the baby by his name - at least give myself some old fashion tactic there. We have a name picked but I will wait to say his name when he's here.
So incredibly happy.![]()
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Anyway. DH came home last night, asked me to sit, and he really want to talk to me one more time about finding out. Rolling my eyes, I let him have his say. He explained how it important it was and felt his anxiety was getting to him. He begins to cry. I felt really bad. DH never crys - this was the 3rd time I've ever seen him cry - the first time was after 3 months of dating, the second was after a really bad fight before we got married, and the third being last night.
I said 'Fine, you can know, but don't tell me'. It wasn't the answer he wanted to hear, but, he didn't protest.
We leave for the doctor. In the car, I got this overwhelming feeling of anxiety myself. For weeks I went back and forth, never really talked about it. I felt worse when I was sitting in the waiting room and it was a half and hour beyond my appointed time. It all came to me at once. Some of you know I was on anti-depressants before I got pregnant (weened off just in time)...since then I've been crazy emotional, but a part of me wanted to at least attempt a surprise because it was something I have never done in my life. Slightly bummed I feel I let myself down partially when the tech asked us if we're finding out and I immediately threw out the word 'Yes'.
At the very last minute, it all came to me, and I am very happy with my decision because...
WE'RE HAVING A BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so over the moon it's ridiculous. I feel like this is not the end of a surprise, and I feel sort of relieved I can be a little more prepared for what I will be enduring. He is so perfect already. He was opening and closing his mouth, moving around, waving, and it suckingggg (really CS?) it's thumb at one point!
I will not however, be referring to the baby by his name - at least give myself some old fashion tactic there. We have a name picked but I will wait to say his name when he's here.
So incredibly happy.
